Motivate Your Child
And Watch Them Rise To The Top
Have you wondered how to motivate your child to do better than the C and B work they seem to be so content doing? Let me share a few tips with you.
Be Your Childs Biggest Fan
It has been said that kids do not gain self esteem simply by having their parents tell them they are great. They get it by achieving goals and doing things for themselves. It is actually a whole lot of both. There is nothing wrong with a child feeling that in his parents eyes he has already won the race, before it even starts. Far a child to achieve great things he must first believe he can. Your job as a parent is to instill that attitude into your child's head.
Praise Instead of Punish
This ties in closely with the first tip. It is far better to say "Jane, that 78 score in math shows you have been working hard, it is up from last week" than to say "Jane, I can not believe you are so bad at math, you better have an 80 next week if you ever want to ever watch TV again." Choose your battles wisely and praise often.
Work On Projects As A Family
Plan and work on activities that allow your children to postpone
gratification. Planting a garden is an excellent example of this. Take the kids to the library and
get a few gardening books, this will help to choose the proper veggies to plant.
Plan the spot for the garden and start watering the area. Plan a trip to
the store for seeds and mulch. Plow the ground, plant the seeds and water
daily. Pick and clean the plants. Plan a meal and cook with them.
There is an enormous amount of family time tied up in this simple project.
There is also the the feeling of achievement from working on this garden,
planning all the way to eating. Consumer shopping is another way to teach
delayed gratification. Before you buy the new flat screen TV, plan a few
research trips, not to buy, just to ask questions and get prices. Compare
prices with those found in ads and online. Research consumer report
reviews when you have reached a short list of sets you are interested in.
You may even want to wait for the upcoming sale where your chosen set will be
reduced by a few hundred dollars.
Teach A Natural Love Of Learning
One of my favorite quotes is "always seek knowledge". The best way to teach this to our children is by example. I am passionate about computers and photography and my kids know this. I have books and magazines all over the place and am often found with my face buried in one of them. They know these are my passions and they also know the only reason I can rebuild a computer is because I have studied and learned about them. Encourage your children to find a passion, something they are excited about. Teach them how to become an expert in their passion. This is how you teach the love of learning, you make them want to learn. They will want to learn about something they are excited about, so they will learn how. Once they know how to learn they will use that knowledge in all aspects of their life.
Don't Set Them Up To Fail
Urging a child to overachieve is not always the best way to go. A high self esteem is built upon successes, not failures. The more successes your child has the more he will want to have. When you here it said that your child would do better if he were more motivated, that is not always the case. Many times your child gets more motivated when he starts to do better. In order to motivate your child it might work best to lower the difficulty of the task and help them gain the skills to conquer it. You can then continue to the next level of difficulty.
Give The Procrastinator A Schedule
How often does bedtime roll around and something, or everything is not yet done? Is it the homework, the shower or the chores, something is not done and it is past bedtime. If you have a child that loves to procrastinate as much as a couple of mine, I have a good tip for you. Schedule the evening hours, from after school till bed. Three to Four was unwind time in front of the tube or a book. Four to six was for homework and after dinner we did chores, bathing and any other business of the day. There was never an argument or a "don't nag me, I said I would do it later.
Try some of these ideas and see if they help to motivate your child to new levels.
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